Chains that bind.

It's not like I can't understand how other people feel but it's not like I want to sympathize with them all the time either. I can't let them feel that what they want will always be what they get and yet at the same time I can't help but hold on to the kind of relationship we have. I don't feel the same way and so I try my best to keep away. The sad thing is the other person also does not want to keep away and rather feels hurt that I avoid that person. But I know in the end it will end up in a rather strange way that one person will be torn between wanting to return to how it was before but hoping not to have thought of that. When things go beyond what is expected it hurts the very nature of our souls and since we are hopeful beings we sometimes want the good things to happen. In some aspects they don't happen the way we want them to so we tend to become pessimists. I am no true optimist since I know and see what the true sides of the coins are. I might be torn between realist and idealist though but I am neither a pessimist nor an optimist. So whenever bad things happen, I deal with them realistically and whenever I go down low I look to the idealist nature of my soul to pick myself up and look for a better future. I'm not trying to say anything new and such but that I can't please everyone and finally though people can misunderstand my actions, some of them are actually well thought of and some of them were done on a whim, which is cruel really. I am a cruel person I know, I've long since known, but I can't live by myself to not hurt other people, or would you rather that was done? Maybe that's a much better path to chose. I've never really thought of it that way, but since we are all humans, meaning we are social beings, I can't survive that way. Forgive me for my selfishness and cruelty but I cannot free you from your burdens and pains just yet.